As I begin to write this, thoughts of this young man flood my memory and I can’t help but smile. Last winter I enjoyed spending countless moments chatting with him on his Florida patio. His looks are striking, however the ease in which he walked into a room and made it his own is what moved me. There was no arrogance to his presence, nor striving to be seen. As a matter of fact his communication wasn’t always verbal yet he always spoke. To this day I still haven’t decided if he is an old soul, a gentle soul or somewhere in between. Only time will tell I suppose.
I was very curious about his answers to my questions since he is younger than the others I chose to ask. I changed up the questions some and as I received them via text I couldn’t help but laugh to myself. Short answers to the point, just like him. At 22 he’s heading toward his career field as a First Responder, I have no doubt he will be successful but wonder how he will balance what seems like a natural compassionate trait with what he will experience on the job.
In our conversations what became crystal clear to me was his self awareness. I found myself looking back when I was that age, wondering was I as self aware and articulate? I’m not really sure, but what I did know is this young man had a freedom that I and my peers at that age did not. This was evident as well when I watched him interact with his siblings and peers.
At this age what does it mean to be a man? “To be a man at my age is to just have an idea and motivation to execute the goals I’ve set to get my life on the track I want.”
When you look at the older men in your life and how they have lived…what mistakes of theirs won’t you be repeating? “Be more open emotionally and take criticism to better myself.”
Is there something you wish women understood about men your age? “Many men, including myself, aren’t where they want to be, be that physically, situationally or mentally and are putting in the work to get better. Most of the time it is a slow process so a little patience goes a long way.”
If you could only choose three words, which three would you hope others would use to describe you? “Confident, Charismatic, Personable.”
As I end this, rereading those three words, I can truly say—Topher Guel you are indeed confident, charismatic and personable. I’m so thrilled to be your aunt and your friend.
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Photo: Shutterstock
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